What People Think When You Have 4 Kids

The Perfect Dad

I will soon have four kids. Therefore you assume that I:

1. Am Mormon or Catholic

2. Like to have sex but don’t know how to use birth control

3. Have plans to start my own farm and therefore need a cheap/free child labor force

I know you’re thinking this because I have thought these things. There is no reason to have more than three kids. TV has taught me this with all-American shows like Modern Family, Roseanne, Different Strokes,The Simpsons, Family Ties, Family Matters, and Growing Pains. These shows illustrate three is the normal number for a family. If you have more than three it’s the whole premise of the show (see The Brady Bunch or the ever expanding Duggar family).

The lesson is clear: Big families are freak shows.

The only explanations for having a big family are the ones I listed at the top of this…

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